“Nobody told me… my best friend would be my surrogate”

This week on Stylist’s Nobody Told Me… Rachel, who can’t biologically have children because of her MRKH diagnosis, talks about the moment her best friend offered to be her surrogate.      

The Nobody Told Me… podcast, sponsored by Clinique, is back with a second season, and the latest guest has another incredible story to share. 

Infertility is something that affects so many women, and yet there is still such a stigma attached to conversations around it. In a world that assumes all women can and will have children, it can be hard to talk openly about the reasons why women can’t get pregnant. That’s why this episode of Nobody Told Me... is so importrant. 

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Rachel was diagnosed with MRKH when she was just sixteen. It’s a female reproductive disorder that presents differently from person-to-person, but in Rachel’s case meant that, while she has ovaries and produces eggs, she cannot carry a baby herself.

She kept her diagnosis mainly to herself and carried on with life, going to university and forging a successful career in events. It wasn’t until she met her partner, Sam, that she began to face how she really felt about motherhood and starting a family, and started to look at her options.

Shortly afterwards, after finally revealing her fertility struggles to her best friends from university, Rachel got a phone call that changed her life. Her best friend Abi offered to be their surrogate. One year later, Abi was pregnant with Rachel and Sam’s baby.

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In the episode, Rachel talks about the practical, legal, physical and emotional realities of having a best friend surrogate. But when Rachel, Abi and Sam arrived at the hospital for the birth, it was all worth it.

“I’ve realised more and more why you should never question someone over why they don’t have kids,” Rachel says. “You never know what someone is going through. You realise more and more when you get to the age that I’m at now that everyone’s got their own shit going on.”

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Nobody Told Me… My Best Friend Would Be My Surrogate is available now on Apple Podcasts, Spotify and Acast. New episodes will be released on Wednesdays and you can go back and listen to episodes from series one.

Images: Stylist, Getty (top image posed by models)

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